Friday, 2 September 2011

Your so stupid

Language, just like society, evolves and in some cases improves as time marches. I get that. I don't stand on the corner in Victorian clothes, putting an f where an s should be. For some reason, and I'm sure your going to call me a pedant with priority issues, I instinctively dismiss people who don't care about grammar. I don't know why, although I feel I should add I am not complaining feverishly about typos and occasional mistakes.

Having said that, the difference between "your and you're" bring me to almost apocalyptic levels of British tuttage that my head literally explodes.

That's another one.

Adding the word "literally" is a choice. It could be left out but it gets added to a metaphor. "I'm literally hanging about the house today". Holy shit really? Like a bat? I'm too old for it but Radio 1 presenters can't open their mouths without "literally exploding". It's so ubiquitous I'm bored of it.

That's another one.

Unlike the "literally" thing, anger at people using "bored of" instead of "bored with" doesn't make any sense. I am fine with "tired of" so really, this might be time to let go and worry about the state of the economy. Their are many more things to get angry about.

That's another one.

Their, there and they're. It just requires a bit of thought. But less people seem to care these days.

That's another one.

Fewer and fewer people distinguish between less (for example water) and fewer (for example buckets of water) that the dictionary is going to have to change to accommodate it. Over my cold, dead, pedantic, OCD body. Just to check it isn't me, I've asked for some friends thought's on the matter.

There's another one.

Possessive apostrophe. I've been known to literally mention this out loud. I sometimes teach at students and about once a year I get asked why they should care. "Isn't language flexible, aren't we just breaking the rules and freeing ourselves of the shackles of your own linguistic restriction?" They ask. Actually I assume that's what they've said, it mostly sounds like "ugh ugh blugh brugher ugh".

I reply anyway..."NO! I bark insanely. NOOOOOOO! You have to know the rules to break them." I argue trendily. It is so bad, I have to use the H-bomb. The ace. The deuce........

"Your cakes taste like Grannies"

1 comment:

  1. Ace.

    Someone once said to me "I'm literally bored out of my head".

    I wanted to see the drill and gore.